Paranormal Activity

Starring: Katie Featherston, Micha Sloat (as themseeeelves....da dum da DUM.... cue  eerie music)

Directed by : Oren Peli

86 min

Rated: R for language

Tagline- Don't see it alone.

This was filmed in 2007. It's an independent-type flick, and the filmmakers did it on the measly budget of  like, I don't know, ten bucks. Or the movie-making equivalent. So here's the skinny on this skeery gol dang film, which you may or may not have ever heard of, and if you have, might possibly have heard accompanied with the tagline- YOU DEMANDED IT, you GOT it!

Basically, this was supposed to be released in only 13 cities across the US. However, word-of-mouth had it that this was not only "different" form your typical horror movie, it was darn GOOD, too. So people could go to this place, and ask that it be shown in their area. They did, it was, and I went and saw it. That's the short version of the story,and if you want the loooong one...well, go here. I don't want to type that much.

This film is made ala Blair Witch... you know, the "home movie" tape that is found after some horrible, inexplicable crime has been committed, and the viewers can piece together thier own idea of whodunit, without a whole lot of intellectual wrestling. There aren't lots of shaky lenses or heavy breathings, but it has enough authenticity to be believable. The stars of the show are a young boyfriend and girlfriend, Katie and Micah, who have been living together for three years and genuinely still seem to like each other. Although "strange things" happened to Katie as a little girl, she hasn't been disturbed by them since the age of thirteen, and has lived a relatively normal, happy, non-paranormal life.... until now. Suddenly, she's hearing things that go bump in the night, and Micah, while a skeptic, loves his girlfriend (and technology) enough to go out and get a video camera, to see if it records any paranormal activity while they're aslumbering. And oh, does it ever. Further details, just to set up the scare- a psychic called to the house not only says this isn't a "human spirit", but that it's not attached to the house, but to Katie.

In other words, she can't run away from it.

I was prepared for scared. And allow me to point out that I'm not too crazy about scary movies. I don't generally think it's "fun" to pee my pants a little in a theater seat while surrounded by heavily perspiring strangers. Ew, bad mental pic, but you can probably see where I'm going with this... scary movies- not my favorite thing.

However. In this case, with all the Broo Haw Haw about it, with the demanding and whatnot, my curiosity was aroused. So, I packed up the oldest son and the husband, figuring two strong shoulders to hide behind would be quite enough, and headed off, with goosebumps premade and ready to spring onto the surface of my skin at a moment's notice.

I was pleasantly surprised. Because it wasn't that scary. It was suspenseful. Oh hell yeah, it was the kind of movie that makes your guts twirl up in a nervous little dance, waiting for the next awful THING to be revealed in those dark, dark shadows over there. At the end, I jumped about three and a half feet straight up in the air, and when you have an ass the size of mine, let me tell you, that is not  common, or easily achieved. But the movie itself didn't scare me... in fact, I spent a lot of the movie being annoyed with Mr. Micah (pronounced Meek uh, and how weird is that, huh?), wannabe hero who kept doing the ABSO wrong things.

SPOILERS about Micah, and a little bit about the plot. Skip the end of the green if you don't like 'em.

Questions about Micah-  The "Does He Not KNOWs"

Come on, where is this kid from??? Does he not know that you LISTEN to the psychic who warns you that the thing in your house is NOT what he is accustomed to working with, as in dead people. If the spirit is not a dead person, there doesn't leave a whole lotta other options, for spirit type. Hello...demons, anyone?

Secondly, does he not know that the very, most absolutely LAST thing you want to do when you are dealing with a demonic spirit is get a frickin' Ouija board? And let me point out here that the psychic warned Micah the Idiot about this, too. "Do NOT use one, you'll be opening a DOOR to the thing", he said...which is pretty unquestionably a command NOT to do it. Doors+ Demons = Bad Times For Everyone.

Does he not know that there comes a point where manly bravery (As in: This is my house, ok? I'm gonna take care of this. We don't need to call the expert, demonologist guy who could probably send this nasty, heavy-footed, growling-deep breathing thing that lurks over my sleeping girlfriend's BODY packing. I can do it all on my own, with my Ouija board and my idiot notions of ghost hunting) becomes straight up imbecilic bravado? Ok, I can see the skepticism when there are just a few little noises his girlfriend is hearing. I can see setting up the camera to get a load of what happens in their cozy little bedroom while they sleep. But when those annoying little irritants have morphed into, oh, I dunno, stuff like: actual beastly footprints tracking straight into the room, OR... the girlfriend not remembering standing over his inert body with a slack, zombie-face for two hours while he slept uncomprehending and innocent, OR.... pictures with the glass shattered over his face and not hers... well, that's time to quit with the wannabe ghost busting and call in the big guns, baby.

Ok, enough with the does he not knows. Obviously... he didn't. And that's where you really, really scared of this kind of movie because yes it's fake but whatif whatif WHATIF it really happeneds can get your peace of mind. See, if you wake in the middle of the night and realize your foot is out from under the covers and have a paranormal activity flashback worthy of tinkling the bed, just remind yourself... in that situation, you DO know, and you never would ignore the psychic, get a ouija board, or decline to call the demonologist. You'd be smart. You'd be the one in the movie who DOESN'T return to a dark house in the middle of a thunderstorm for your favorite CD. That's you, that's me. We're the bright ones. So we're safe.

end of the GREEN.

Yes, I enjoyed it. It was a little slow to start, with some low-level crap going on the first few nights, enough to capture Micah's attention and make him a believer (although a dumb one) but nothing terribly terrifying. But just wait for it.  "Night 20" was scary enough to have me clutching the husband's arm and leaving little moon-shaped claw marks that have yet to fade. And the ending, abrupt and OH-SHIT as prescribed for these sorts of movies, was a jolt and a half. I loved it. 

I give it four &s

&... it was an original, independent film made for three buck and change...that deserves an & in the multi-kabillion dollar movie industry

&... the characters were well-played enough to make you genuinely concerned about their well-being

&... it was scary in just the right way, non-bloodnguts, but instead sweet suspense that makes you hold your breath

&... it will make you jump, just a little...and if afterwards you say you didn't, you're a liar, buddy.

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